Thursday, June 09, 2005
Everybody went out to look at the apartment. Except me.
Ven told me that maybe next week we will be going. Maybe. Took a nap.
Woke up at 3 for arts. Got everything in my hand. Alex burst in into the room suddenly and say JOHN! WE ARE GOING TO SEE HOUSE. I said, huh? What house? he then said, the apartment lah. I told him, hah. I have got class. Then he just answered, TOO BAD in a sarcastic tone. I just kept cool, got my stuff and stormed out of the room. Everybody is outside already. Why do I have to go for arts. I could have just skip, but it’s a double period and I need that 2 hours to work on my major work in order to finish it asap. I heard Fenny and Ellex said bye to me at level3. The whole art period, I was in a thunderous mood. Feeling angry and sad over nothing. Talked to nobody. Just sat at the very back of the class. Back facing everybody. Paint my stupid bloody senseless picture. Squeezing all the paints from the bottles onto the canvas. Smushing it here and there. Making a big mess. Just couldnt get the exact effect I wanted. Curse van gogh. Feel like just stabing everybody that gets on my nerves. Especially that super arrogant Ivy. She is new and yet so proud. Tried being friendly to her to make her feel welcome but she just grunt when people acknowledge her. What sort of attitude. I wonder how her friend Emily can stand her insults. Feel like taking the whole bottle of black paint and pour over her face. What is wrong with me?? Why am I so boiled over with this tiny matter. It is just not me. Maybe its because I just woke up and got stabbed right away. I think its just my perasan. Perasan again.. Need time to cool down. Would be back in my usual self in just a few minutes. Wanted to listen to music, but Vivien took the cd that I wanted away. So I just BLAST my music out from the com. Alex is sure to get pissed with me when he got back because he is allergic to music. Dont care. I dont have my headphones with me. Why must I always let other people’s will take over me? Huh.
ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at