..A World of Nonsense..

why is this feeling still here... felt my blood starting to boil.
next time, you will have to be responsible for your own things.

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 7:15 PM

maybe i should work on something.
i should be more productive.

practice my japanese
start drawing manga
write a story
do my esl assessment
cook some new stuff to eat.

or maybe i should just go sleep
and never have to wake up ever again. i hope.
i want to see what is up there..

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 9:39 PM

i am lonely...
loneliness sucks.
sucks sucks sucks sucks sucks

good. nobody knew that i am still keeping this stupid blog. i cant rant what ever i want. nobody will ever find out.
nobody cares for me anyway..
ceh.

boringboringboringboringboringboringboring.
lonely
fucking lonely....

:'(

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 9:37 PM

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ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 9:36 PM

The world is full of hatred, jealousy, loneliness, envious, boredom, anger, that we must try to musk with smilling faces everyday.
Why cant all of this just end and we all rest in peace with God where nothing is impossible for him up there.
If given a choice, i will love to join Him where i can gain eternal freedom.

i want somebody that can accompany me throughout the rest of my life...
being alone in this room really sucks...
i have so many things to do in mind, but just couldnt bother to start doing it.
why.
why.
why!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

everyday the same question
why did so many things happened?

i just could not understand.
Dear God, help me. save me.. please

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 9:29 PM

ah. the stress level is building up. must learn how to control my emotions. i noticed that i have become too sensitive. too emotive as well. a little thing happened and i will think something else and get upset.
if only i could just have what i wanted.
if only i could push away what i dont want.
if only..
if only dreams comes true.
then i wont have to cry again.
i wont have to dream again.

is the past going to repeat itself again?
will things happen again?
i want. but somehow, cant.
it is like so close to it, but somehow feel impossible.

merely
reflections
i guess...

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 8:03 PM

Finally. everything poured out. much much relieved i felt. no more secrets. no more lies.
but what will this bring. what will lie ahead, i coulnt figure out.
hopefully, things will go on smooth sailing, instead of having more conflicts occured.
hopefully, changing will be as smooth sailing,
i need to change, change for sacrifices made, change for feelings hurt, change for the future,
if not, everything will be wasted. trust and thus friendship will be gone.
as a tears flow, I sat back and realised, i am not alone anymore, finally, i have someone that i can talk to.
thank you.

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 5:31 PM

ok. I revived this blog from the grave.
Gonna start writing soon.
not now..
dont feel like it.
日本語を買うことができる？

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 2:37 AM

went to market city with sonic to repair my phone. The guy at level 3 told me that he can disect it and clean the inside for me. If it works, 50bucks, if not, FOC. so i gave it a try. He told us to come back in 40 minutes, so we went to hav breakfast+lunch+dinner at Ramen-Kan, jap ramen house. damn nice the ramen. really worth the money with the "liao" inside. yumm yumm.. drooling..

Sonic bought wristbands. I chose 1 for him. The spiky 1. Wanted to buy that actually, but he bought it instead. -_-" nvm.. save 10 for me. haha.

My phone is busted.
so sad.
what to do..
i guess have to send to Samsung for repair when i get back to m'sia...
:'(
shouldnt waste so much time worrying.. lots of assignments due soon.
shit.

Alex is sick. poor thing.. caughing very badly.
His classes finish at 12 now. that means no more blasting music in the afternoon.. -_-" haiz...
nevermind la. few months more.. then i'll go back m'sia already. maybe get a new roommate when i come back. maybe move out. dunno yet.
i got a little irritated coz i decided to cook Ayam Kurma for lunch. then alex say he cannot eat. then i wanna got sambal eggs. alex says he cannot eat also. -_-" i ask why? is it because of the sambal? he say nope. because of the egg. he cant eat hard boil eggs. i like:"err... but i'll deep fry the egg also." he then answer:" i only eat fried eggs." aaaaaa..... -_-""
anway.. i made herbal tea eggs yesterday. turn out quite nice. eveybody liked them.
made barley water for venn also.

aiyoh....
why so many bad things happened last week.
hp spoil.
mam scold.
cannot play com.
lots of assignment.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

so frustrated.

:'(

there are somethings that i dont want to care but just couldnt help it.

.....

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 9:33 AM

Not very happy today. well.. had a very fun time.. until i broke my phone. AGAIN.
Went to the library at circular quay with Jerrand to borrow stuff for my art research. then went to meet ian, shahid and loong(vietnamese loong, not ah loong) at the internet cafe in the city.
wanted to eat sushi at Sushi Train, budden closed. so we went to Chinatown to try out a new japanese ramen restaurant. Really really nice. i spoke jap to the cashier girl then she speak jap back to me. quite fun. hehe.

went to Ian's apartment later for swimming. It had been sometime since i swam. We had a real fun time. We played in the jacuzzi and also the steam room and sauna. Then we decided to call william here too. William bring any xtra cloths so he didnt want to get into the water. i passed my phone to him and the went back into the water together with jerrand, loong and ian. Ian then decided that we push william into the pool. so he pretended to ask william to pull him out, then asked me to jump off the pull, then push william into it. I forgot that my phone is with him!!! William immediately jump off the pool and emptied his pocket. my phone, his phone, his wallet, keys, usb drive all wet. i quickily ran down to the showers and took out the batery and then blow dry the phone. but still wont work.

:'(

listening to diana krall's jazz now... try to lighten up my mood.

my eyes hurts like shit..can barely keep them open for a minute. thanks to the clorine.

ccg better not get in my sight tonight.

ジョン君 stepped on your garbage at 6:11 PM